gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
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