There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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