did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
