It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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