I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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