don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize