it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
