its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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