i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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