I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
