belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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