I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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