I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
