She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
