I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
