shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
