so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
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