I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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