I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
