i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
