In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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