we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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