And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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