On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
