Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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