I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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