one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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