love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
