go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize