well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
