I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
