Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
