Screwed.edu
even my farts smell like vagina
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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