school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize