An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
