He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
