No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
