so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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