walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
