I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
