You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize