Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Randomize
