Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
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