My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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