So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
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