Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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