that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
