Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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