My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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