My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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