Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
