my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
