sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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